Some cool definitions

Sometimes it feels good to read such definitions when you are struck out somewhere with some problem!


Atom Bomb: An invention made to end all inventions.


Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.


Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.


Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read.


College: A place where some pursue learning and others learn pursuing.


Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.


Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.


Criminal: A guy no different from the rest… except that he has got caught.


Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.


Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.


Divorce: Future tense of marriage.


Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.


Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.


Etc: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.


Father: A banker provided by nature.


Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through “the minds of either”.


Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.


Marriage: It’s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor’s degree and a woman gains her master’s.


Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.


Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.


Opportunists: One who starts having a bath when he/she accidentally falls in a river.


Optimist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.


Pessimist: A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO,instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.


Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.


Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.


Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.


Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power.


Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

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